Oh Debih, so not want you wanted - I am sorry
Hopefully you get to read today; and if they are there then just comment how much you've been looking forward to relaxing on the beach with a book and that it's the best part of a holiday and hopefully she'll get the hint and leave you alone.
As for Gosforth - definitely the clown wig; but don't forget the castanets and pineapple hat. She'll then think you've gone completely barmy
and hopefully will steer well clear
Stay firm!