A question about tipping in restaurants

[Workingman]

Two contrasting stories..... and why tips are a minefield.

My son worked in a local modern food restaurant mainly used by upper working class or lower middle class diners. He could double his wages from cash tips.... especially those from large groups on a night out. The owner did not believe in service charges as she thought that decent waiters would bring in the punters.

My daughter worked in a restaurant in one of Leeds' chic areas where many young 'professionals' dined. They tended to view the mandatory service charge as the tip and rarely offered any extra. Given the cost of the meals and the charge at 12.5% the staff were not convinced that it was passed on in full, or anywhere near.

Both of them were on nat min wage as their base rate.

[miasmum]

Exactly She is lovely and I have been going to her for years, but hard up she certainly ain't

I will always ask for a service charge to be removed. I choose what I pay for service not them.

Another two contrasting stories

Tim and I went to Rye for the weekend. The first night we ate in a pizza express or something similar. Bill came to about £20 but the waiter was lovely. Really friendly, asked if we were on holiday, offered suggestions of where to go for a drink and we tipped more than 10% because he deserved it, but 10% would have been £2

Second night ate at a really posh restaurant, pushed the boat out. Had wine and brandies and the bill was about £70.00. Service was just service, ok, but nothing special. But 10% = £7.00

How does that work then?

[Kaz]

I get my hair cut in Supercuts (I don't like to throw my money around either!) - often the girls in there are run off their feet, and sometimes there is only one of them in all day on their own! Not sure that is legal, but that's shop work for you these days I tip them because they get paid very little, and I am always given great service! In the nail bar the workers are Chinese, I doubt they go skiing much so I tip them too, in cash

[meriad]

My daughter worked in a restaurant in one of Leeds' chic areas where many young 'professionals' dined. They tended to view the mandatory service charge as the tip and rarely offered any extra. Given the cost of the meals and the charge at 12.5% the staff were not convinced that it was passed on in full, or anywhere near.

Ah, now if I see a mandatory service charge added to my bill I also won't pay more than that final total - as far as I am concerned that service charge IS the tipl but it's just conveniently been calculated for me. I also usually always try to pay that service charge in cash because then I know it'll go where it's meant to be, but if I don't have the cash then I'll always ask if that money actually does go to the person who has served. Legislation has changed and it now is a legal requirement for said service charge to be paid to the serving staff, and more often than not it is, but the staff is then taxed on that vs no tax on the cash tips

Seriously, I don't begrudge most waiters / waitresses that tip - they work their backsides off to make sure I have a lovely evening. Yes there always will be that exception but they are very few and far between

[debih]

I think it's all very personal.

You should only tip if you want to tip and if you do, you tip as much or as little as you want.

I don't tip in cafes unless the service is exceptional. But then again it has to be very good service for me to tip anywhere.

As an ex banqueting manager, with grandparents who were 5 star hoteliers my standars are incredibly high when I'm paying for food and service. If the foods dire but the service is excellent I'll tip, but if the food is amazing and the service mediocre I wont.

Just do what you feel comfortable with MM - it doesn't matter what your dinner companions do.

Oh, and I also refuse to pay added service charge, especially as that generally goes to the restaurant and not the staff.

[miasmum]

Well it would seem it is purely down to choice then.

Nothing has convinced me to pay more and I rarely see waiting staff working their backsides off, but again that is because of where I eat out. I don't go to busy places, I never go into town so the restaurants I use are quiet and rarely full, usually a pub e.g. chef and brewer or the 2 for £10 type Actually we never tip at our local because you go to the bar to order, you go to the bar to pay and all they do is carry a plate to your table. I presume no one would tip for that would they?

I would probably tip if I used a salon like that too Kaz, but I don't as I said my hairdresser works alone from her converted garage. She still charges £60 for a cut and colour, so I feel she pays herself a decent wage. I do buy her a voucher at Christmas because she is lovely and we have become friends. Likewise the lady who does my waxing, I buy her a gift at Christmas, because she is like a friend too.

[miasmum]

Just do what you feel comfortable with MM - it doesn't matter what your dinner companions do.

but I do feel uncomfortable when she is paying extra to make my tip up to the 10% and she always always insists on 10% regardless of the service. Once when the service was so bad, I let her leave the 10% then as we left I darted back and reclaimed it from the table and gave her it back. She was not happy but I just couldn't let her do that

Its just silly in my opinion.

[Kaz]

But she wanted to Shell, and that was her choice

It sounds to me like something you need to sort out with your friend, as you will just keep getting different personal opinions for us lot

[Workingman]

Ah, now if I see a mandatory service charge added to my bill I also won't pay more than that final total - as far as I am concerned that service charge IS the tipl but it's just conveniently been calculated for me.

Now you see I didn't think that a mandatory service charge had to be shared out or passed on 'in full'.

It might be mandatory to you, the customer, but how is disbursed is up to the restaurant. Becks is adamant that she never got anything like 12.5% on the meals she served. She is also certain that even if it was shared between kitchen, bar staff and waiters it was still not representative.

[miasmum]

Thats fine Kaz and that is what makes it interesting.

Maybe it was her choice but honestly that night they were so rude. They actually asked us to finish our wine in the bar as we were the last ones in the restaurant and they wanted to go home. It was only 10pm. Cant have it all ways, go home early or a tip, its your choice