Vocal Voices

on the day after I cleaned the lounge from top to bottom and on the day that we are going to put all the Christmas decorations up, Mick has decided to chip all the plaster off the chimney breast so he can sink three enormous metal brackets into the wall to sit the (bloody horrible) new mantle piece on.

Maybe if I liked the mantle piece I would be happier about it but I dont - I hate it. But I told him he could chose what he wanted, thinking he was imagining it the same way I was.

A lovely piece of thick, smooth oak that will look gorgeous with candles on and the mirror above it.

His idea - a bloody great big old house beam thats all rough and bumpy.

I will put photos up when its done - if it gets done today as he is doing lots of swearing at the moment. I didn't even realise that he was planning on doing it (obviously as I wouldn't have had a marathon cleaning session yesterday) I just heard the drill going and went to see what he was doing.

Men do have an odd sense of timing, don't they?

And very odd taste, too, sometimes

Well, it is almost up and looks as horrible as I expected it to.

I am hoping that he is going to do something with the wood - it is very natural looking. I had assumed that it would at least be sanded down a little and waxed. I have not dared ask - I will not mention it. He knows that it was a million miles away from what I wanted but I agreed to let him have whatever he wanted.

I think he is probably very aware that I don't like it (apart from the fact that I told him when he bought it that I didn't like it and when he held it up against the wall I told him that I didn't like it) as he has just called me in to ask if it looks too high. It does but it is in fact lower than where the old mantle piece was so my only comment was "if thats where the old one came to, leave the new one there" and walked out again. Probably with a look of disgust on my face

Looking forward to seeing it Debih

Ha - he's not sure if he likes it now!

Its not as horrible as I first thought - from a distance. But when you get closer to it it's all rough and uneven. He did say that he will be waxing it but not smoothing it down - that adds character apparently.

Even the rusty old nail smack back centre front is staying as it adds character. (Its staying for as long as he's in the house then it is going to fall out as I brush against it).

I will post a photo later when he isn't around - I don't want him to think that you might all be admiring it.

My cunning plan is to cover it in candles and light them later on. He hates candles.

He particularly hates smelly candles - of which I have many.

I will put lots of things that he doesn't like on it and that might make him dislike it even more!

Oh gawd Debbie, they're a law unto themselves!

John keeps talking about making a bench out of railway sleepers, and now he's talking about also using them to make some kind of low wall type edge along the patio

It is a well known fact that we men do not take hints, Debih.

If you didn't actually "tell him" tell him that you didn't like it, and then tell him again, with diagrams (we love diagrams) he probably though that you liked it.

Another lesser known fact is that we like a spotlessly clean space to start work in. Cleaning the lounge will only have encouraged him to start putting up the mantle shelf you so love.

Mick wanted to use a railway sleeper to make the fire place. We ended up in a reclamation yard when we were in Whitby and bought this bloody great beam home.

It was a ships beam you know before it went into a country house. Yeh, right and I'm the Queen of Sheba.

He's looking for the tube of black lead polish now to polish up the stove - probably in hope of making the mantle look better. I actually think I lent it to someone and never got it back but I've omitted to tell him that.

I'm going to go and sit in there now and glare at it!

Blimey, the staff in the reclamation yard saw him coming!

As well as candles and all that, how about some fairy lights draped along the front?