Smoking, drinking and unmarried sex
An Angel visited a woman and told her she must give up smoking, drinking and unmarried sex if she wanted to get into Heaven. The woman said she would try her best.
The Angel visited the woman a week later to see how she was getting on.
"Not bad" said the woman, "I've given up smoking and drinking but then I bent over to look in the freezer, my boyfriend caught sight of my long slender legs in high heels, he pulled up my skirt and made love to me right then and there."
"They don't like that in Heaven", said the Angel.
The woman replied: "They're not crazy about it in Aldi either!